Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Correlation

Correlation

"After interviewing thousands of people, I have found a strong correlation exists between being smart and agreeing with me."

Friday, June 25, 2010

Ex nihilo

Ex nihilo

"Enough! You are not the center of the universe, you know."

"Let there be!"

POP

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Access

Access

INTERNET ADVERTISEMENT BUREAU

Friday, June 18, 2010

Vocabulary

Vocabulary

Can someone explain to me where 200 cartoons came from?

"No way! Those names are synonymous with superstition and irrationality and I have banned them from my rationalistic, atheist vocabulary. It's a matter of principles!"

"As you wish, but if you don't tell me the names of the planets, you'll fail astronomy."

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Children

Children

"Look what my dad got me! Devout, obedient and totally sin free! What about you? Still playing with that one you made yourself? He he.

"WAAAH!"

Friday, June 11, 2010

Robotics

Robotics

"The key to our commercial success is that our industrial robots are shaped after a human worker."

"Doesn't that make them less efficient?"

"Yes, but it also makes yelling at them and mistreating them more personally fulfulling."

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Detector

Detector

"Since you will only believe in what can be detected and measured, check this out. This instrument registers physiological reactions related to the fact of being offended, giving an objective, scientific assessment of the reliability of beliefs."

"The premise is invalid. Your being offended because your beliefs are being questioned doesn't make those beliefs true."

DING

"Gotcha!"

Friday, June 4, 2010

Palmistry

Palmistry

Of course it's a science! Look at how the police examines the lines of the fingers to find out whether someone is a criminal."

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Defense

Defense

"You saw it! They attacked us while we were peacefully boarding their ship. Everything after that we did it in self defense."

"Aye aye, captain!"